Thursday, July 24, 2008
at 8:54 AM
Returning from a nice weekend away (with a few stumbling blocks, but overall good), we enjoyed our time away. Sometimes it is nice to get away and just have time to reconnect. I have learned a lot about myself since I last posted. I have learned that I am not as in control as I think I am and it's a good thing! For weeks, I have spent lots of time trying to cure my brother's cancer, make phone calls, manage my career, help run the business, and in between it all, still maintain a healthy home life. NOTHING seemed to be falling into place and I found myself asking what I did to deserve all of this. Eddie and I were talking about his mom and how her health has declined so rapidly and he spoke of the guilt that he had when he became frustrated as she repeated the same story 5 times during one conversation. I told him that a time would soon come when he would beg to hear her tell that story 5 times and that eventually, she would not recognize him or anyone else. She would simply be a shell of the woman that he used to know. As I told him this, it became a reality to me that through all of our earthly trials and tribulation here, we are really only meant to enjoy our family and loved ones for a short time on earth. How often we take for granted our goodnight kisses, our "I love you's" as we hang up the phone and most importantly, oblivious to the time we waste trying to control our lives instead of enjoying it. The truth be known, I needed to "practice what I preached" to him and learn to not push and pull so much. Even when we don't see it, God hears our prayers and if we remain steadfast in it, he will give us what is best for us. When you finally realize that you are a part of a massive Learning Curve, the flowers smell more aromatic, the ocean is more blue, the colors are much more vibrant, and life is such a better place to be. Be still and pay attention to that still small voice inside of you; you may just teach yourself a lesson. God is good..........all the time.